Funny Moments
 
Notifications
Clear all

Funny Moments

137 Posts
28 Users
86 Likes
37.3 K Views
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 
~Speaking of Pee~
 
You examine your black sandstone mortar.
> Waylon nods surely to you, "no makin' poison's wi' tha."
> You chuckle at Waylon, "O' course nae! Only if I wanted tae gae huntin' game wi' poisoned arrows wud I dae tha'."
> Diego wrinkles his angular nose at you, "That would get into the meat."
> Diego winks at you, "But I will show you the strong plants."
> You shake your head at Diego, "Nae if ye roast it slow o'er a fire, til th' poison gits oot."
> Diego tells you, "Just pee on it."
> You laugh.
> Thalia worries about the Piazza Vecchia fountain dangerously, "I'm not sure I trust any of you to feed me meat ever now."ve.
> Thalia means Diego and you mostly.
> You laugh at Thalia's words.
> Diego smiles at Thalia, "I hunt without poisons."
> Thalia hopes to Diego impishly, "And without pee?"
> Diego adds, "I love wild game to much to taint it."
> Diego nods to Thalia, "Minus the pee."
>
> Thalia shifts her round pale blue eyes lots, "I don't care at what point you pee on it, if you do pee on it I am most assuredly not eating it."
> Waylon chuckles, "I don' know anythin' abou' hun'in'. So I jus' ge' mea' from th' buthcher."
> Diego tells Waylon, "When hunting starts I will make sure to get you some fresh game, it's the best."
Thalia suggests to Waylon differently, "Already cooked."
> You sigh, "Ye all ken tha' I nivver waste gud food, let alane piss on it."
> Waylon nods to Thalia, "That too."
 
> Thalia giggles at you, "I really really really hope not."
> Thalia stresses her words, "Really."
> You laugh
> Thalia reminds the Piazza Vecchia fountain generally, "Miss Lacey will be hosting a courtesy discussion in under a hour or so."
 
(Sounds like we need a courtesy discussion! XD)

   
ReplyQuote
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 

~Speaking of Pee, Part II~

Thalia considers then, "I haven't gotten to meet the Marquis yet."
> You ask Thalia curiously, "Th' Markee?"
 
 
> Thalia explains to you, "Duke Salazars aid and help. Marquis...um...P something?"
> Thalia peeks at Sir Savion confirmingly, "P something?"
> You chuckle mischievously at Thalia, "I kenned tha' ye didna want me tae pee on yer meat, Miss Thalia."
> Sir Savion says, "Pascual."
> You grin.
> Thalia scrunches her thin nose at you, "No, no. We determined I do not eat pee meat."
Sir Savion blinks at you, "Eww?"
> You laugh at Sir Savion's expression.
> Thalia agrees with Sir Savion wholeheartedly, "Eww."
> Diego asks Sir Savion, "Pascual...yeah that."
> Thalia repeats then, "Pascual. I haven't gotten to meet him yet."
> You chuckle to Sir Savion, "Ye werena here fer th' bit o' th' conversation wha' I be referrin' tae, Sir."
> Viscountess Tara tells Thalia, "Some dyes require pee in them to make them set well."
> Diego tells Sir Savion, "Thalia was talking about peeing on things."
> Viscountess Tara peeks at Thalia, "No kidding."
> Thalia shifts her round pale blue eyes, "I was. Still-"
> Diego totally doesn't take the blame.
> Thalia gasps at Diego affrontedly, "I was not!"
> Sir Savion says, "I'm glad I wasn't around."
> Sir Savion winces.
> You nod to Viscountess Tara, "Aye! Tha' be true. An' ye have tae soak wool in piss, when ye're gaein' tae waulk it, tae turn it intae tweed."
> Thalia points at Diego accusingly, "You told Margrat to pee on the meat to get the poison out!"
> Diego nods, "Something about marking territory."
>
> Diego hears Thalia, "That's jelly fish stings."
>
> Thalia puffs her cheeks, "I don't need to pee on anything to mark it."
 
You laugh merrily at Diego and Thalia.
Viscountess Tara nods to you.
> Diego shakes his head, "Don't pee on the meat."
> Thalia smoothes her elegant iridescent iris damask corsetted overlay dress carefully, "I am a lady of um...politeness and stuff."
> Diego nods to you, "She walks in pee."
> You chuckle at Diego's words.
> Viscountess Tara peeks at Thalia, "Oh?"
Thalia narrows her round pale blue eyes at Diego, "I am not peeing on anything!"
> Diego chuckles.
> Sir Savion says to Viscountess Tara, "You don't count, you work with dyes."
> Thalia tells Viscountess Tara surely, "Yes!"
> Viscountess Tara asks Thalia, "So you do not pee then?"
> Viscountess Tara grins at Sir Savion, "And materials."
> Diego appears to be proud.
> Diego smiles amusedly.
> Sir Savion says to Viscountess Tara, "If you're peeing on clothing to mark them.. There is a problem."
> You chortle at Thalia's attitude.
> Viscountess Tara says to Sir Savion, "Nay not doing that."
> Diego tells Sir Savion, "We cover our clothes in doe urine to hide our scent."
> Viscountess Tara peeks at Thalia, "You must build up then by the end of the day."
> Sir Savion says to Diego, "Then you smell like a poorly trained yearling?"
> Diego nods to Sir Savion, "Pretty much."
> Thalia grumps at the Piazza Vecchia fountain harmlessly, "That isn't what I meant!"
> Viscountess Tara giggles at Sir Savion.
> Diego grins, "Why we sleep outside."
> Thalia crosses her arms under her chest.
>
> Viscountess Tara grins at Thalia, "I tease Thalia, I love you."
> Diego tells Viscountess Tara, "She doesn't have to pee to mark things, she marks them other ways."
> Thalia points at Diego, "That!"
> Thalia winks at Viscountess Tara good-naturedly.
> Diego nods, "Just licks them."
> Viscountess Tara tisks at Diego.
> Thalia flushes at Diego's words.
> Thalia stares at Diego briefly.
> Viscountess Tara tells Thalia, "No it is this way."
> Thalia quips to Diego sassily, "A shame you shall never know."
> Sir Savion hands Tara a Mandalorian helm.
> Thalia raises her thin nose primly.
> Viscountess Tara stares unblinkingly at Diego.
> Diego blinks at Thalia, "I'm telling lacey."
> Diego laughs.
> Diego states, "Totally not what I meant."
>
> Viscountess Tara stares unblinkingly at Diego.
> Thalia giggles at Viscountess Tara's gaze.
> Diego peeks at Viscountess Tara.
> Diego touches his groomed salt-n-pepper beard, "Cookie crumbs?"
> Thalia grins at Diego then, "I am perfectly sure Lacey would believe no such smudge upon my character."
> Viscountess Tara remains quiet.
> Viscountess Tara stares unblinkingly at Diego.
> Diego grins at Viscountess Tara, "What?"
> Viscountess Tara says to Thalia, "See?"
> Diego states, "You both made it dirty, I was just saying like food and such."
> Thalia giggles at Viscountess Tara, "I see."
> Viscountess Tara tells Thalia, "I learned that from Eme's daughter."
> Diego tells Thalia, "Married women have a secret power, this gaze they give."
> Thalia peers at Diego dubiously, "Uh huh."
>
> Thalia dips her demeanor a-little, "Poor Eme."
> Viscountess Tara nods to Diego, "Yep."
> Viscountess Tara nods to Thalia, "I know."
> Diego tells Sir Savion, you, Viscountess Tara and Thalia, "I shall be right back, I have a surprise to show you."
> Diego smiles happily.
> Diego bows to Sir Savion, you, Viscountess Tara and Thalia.
> Thalia frowns quietly, "I hope she is okay. And her travel is safe."
> Diego steps softly out through an expanse of Piazza Vecchia to the north.
> Viscountess Tara nods to Thalia, "I do as well."
> Sir Savion nods, "Now I worry."
>
> Thalia peeks at Sir Savion curiously, "About Diego?"
> Sir Savion nods.
> Thalia shifts her round pale blue eyes, "As long as he doesn't try to pee on me."
> A hulking dark brown mastiff whines pitifully.
> Viscountess Tara pets a hulking dark brown mastiff.
> Viscountess Tara tells a hulking dark brown mastiff, "You have already had potty time."

   
ReplyQuote
Thalia
(@thalia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 137
 
Orla smiles at a dainty fine-featured toddler, "Mari!"
 Emmaline steps aside as a dainty fine-featured toddler sprints to Orla with a smile, "Orla, my Orla!!"
 Emmaline's waifish little baby giggles mirthfully as Emmaline tickles him.

 A dainty fine-featured toddler runs away.

A dainty fine-featured toddler leaves through a pair of sleek double doors leading east.
 Orla blinks, "Okay bye."

   
ReplyQuote
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 
exa bucket
 
A watertight wooden bucket filled to the brim with... well, water. Floating and bobbing in the bucket are several ripe, red apples. The general idea of the bucket game is to bob for an apple without using any of your limbs. Warning: some of these apples look a tad odd and may not be what they appear. [OOC: play applebucket] An average delicate woman is standing near a wooden bucket of apples.
 
> The assistant shows the bucket to you, "There are red apples in here. If you can grab one without using your hands, feet or tail, I'll give you a prize. Only one token, what do you say?"
 
play applebucket
Type @YES or @NO to respond to this question.
 
> You opt not to try. Spoil sport.
@no
 
exa basket
A tightly woven lidded basket made of dried rushes. The lid is set slightly off revealing something shiny within it. As you take a closer look inside the basket you notice a small black snake with glowing amber eyes which appears to be heavily agitated. Several shiny tokens can be spotted at the bottom of the basket.
> > You move from an expanse of Piazza di Gioco to the west to the cool, damp ground.
pet snake
> You pet a small black snake.

   
ReplyQuote
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 
You are standing near a polished oak door leading northeast. A mounted dark blue spearfish is hanging on the with burgundy and argent stripes stone western wall. A food tray and a dessert tray are lying on a golden oak table. A glass covered nature scene is standing on a golden oak table.
 
> You take a mounted dark blue spearfish.
take fish
 
> You examine your mounted dark blue spearfish.
exa my fish
 
This is a mounted dark blue spearfish. This is quite a large fish. It is a monument of fishing prowess.
The mounted dark blue spearfish appears to be of bad quality.
 
> > You move from a polished oak door leading northeast to the with burgundy and argent stripes stone western wall.
hang my fish on west wall
 
> You hang your mounted dark blue spearfish on the with burgundy and argent stripes stone western wall.
A mounted dark blue spearfish almost appears to scream in agony.
 
WTF was that?!? LOL. XD

   
ReplyQuote
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 
> 21:38 [Chat|Dame Ava] "Now I'm just hearing that Queen song in my head...that'll be playing all night"
 
> 21:38 [Chat|Margrat] "DON'T QUOTE IT!! Pop songs get stuck in my head for hours!"
 
> 21:39 [Chat|Esquire Faust] "HERE WE ARE"
 
> SCARAMOUCHE! SCARAMOUCHE!
 
> 21:39 [Chat|Margrat] "FAUST, STFU!!! *smacks Faust*"
 
> 21:39 [Chat|Esquire Faust] "Topsy, wrong song."
 
> 21:39 [Chat|Margrat] "... Uh... What the heck was that?"
 
> 21:39 [Chat|StoryHostess Topsy] "I went with the superior one"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Lazare] "...will you do the fandango?"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Thalia] "That made me giggle"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Lazare] "on"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Esquire Faust] "WHO WAAAAAAAANTS TO LIVE FOOOOREVER"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Thalia] "high-key not me"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Esquire Faust] "Same"
 
> 21:40 [Chat|Margrat] "Faust, you are now officially on my sh!t list. Prepare for dead rats and rotten fish in the mail."
 
> 21:41 [Chat|Maena] "Literally logged onto it.."
 
> 21:41 [Chat|Esquire Faust] "Plz no I only share the beauty of Queen music."
 
> 21:41 [Chat|StoryHostess Topsy] "Don't make me do the thing to the crab, miss Margrat..."
 
> 21:41 [Chat|Lazare] "I thought that was Liras' shtick?"
 
> 21:41 [Chat|Margrat] "XD"
 
> 21:41 [Chat|Margrat] "Topsy, NOOOOO!!!!!"
 
> 21:42 [Chat|Thalia] "i have so many questions and I also really don't want to know. Sounds painful"
 
> 21:42 [Chat|Margrat] "LOL"
 
> 21:42 [Chat] "StoryHostess Topsy giveth and StoryHostess Topsy can taketh away. Mwahaha"

   
ReplyQuote
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 
Gotta appreciate the humor, even while frustrated by these doggone rat trap bugs! XD
 
> You examine the surroundings.
exa
Running from north to south between two buildings, this alleyway is dimly lit by lit by the dark, cloudy skies overhead overhead. The cool, damp ground is composed of large, irregular slabs of limestone worn smooth by the passage of time and travelers.
 
You see Via d'Acqua to the south; and Via lo Est to the north.
 
You are standing near here. A short emaciated man is standing near narrow stretch of alley to the north.
 
> You cannot break from combat while you are being attacked. You are currently being targeted by: a tiny dark brown rat
n
You cannot leave an alley while in combat.
You can attempt to 'breakcombat' to end the fight. Or you can defeat or be defeated by your opponents.
> You cannot break from combat while you are being attacked. You are currently being targeted by: a tiny dark brown rat
s
You cannot leave an alley while in combat.
You can attempt to 'breakcombat' to end the fight. Or you can defeat or be defeated by your opponents.
> You flee.
flee
> You run.
run
> You are standing all alone already. Why do you wish to be even more lonely?
leave

   
ReplyQuote
Thalia
(@thalia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 137
 
> OOC -- You say, "I can drag you cause of connectivity <.<"
> OOC - Lady Kilana loses her connection.
> OOC -- You say, "....I giggled to much at that"

   
ReplyQuote
Thalia
(@thalia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 137
 
> OOC -- Esquire Faust says, "You remind me of the babe."
> OOC -- You say, "What babe?"
> OOC -- Esquire Faust says, "The babe with the power"
> OOC -- You say, "What power?"
> OOC -- Esquire Faust says, "The power of voodoo."
> OOC -- You say, "Who do?"
> OOC -- Esquire Faust says, "You do."

   
ReplyQuote
Thalia
(@thalia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 137
 
Esquire Faust considers a billiard table and Gus, "... You got lucky..."
> Esquire Faust grins widely, "I can get lucky, too."
> Esquire Faust turns around a billiard table.
> Esquire Faust shoots a billiard table.
> Esquire Faust ricochets the cue ball around the table till and end up only hitting the other player's ball. No points won.
> You shift your round pale blue eyes lots.
> Archduke Alonzo glimpses toward Esquire Faust and you sidelong, "Watch yourself."

   
ReplyQuote
Thalia
(@thalia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 137
 
Orla gasps.
> Orla climbs down from a broad-shouldered pitch black friesian horse
Orla leaves through a door leading northwest.
Orla arrives through a door leading northwest.
OOC -- Orla says, "<.< pretend that took longer"
Petite in height and elegantly-shaped in build, Orla Couture is a young woman of olive complexion with a head of hip-length luminous pitch-black hair, worn in a french twist. She is carrying a stocky blue roan cow, a small brown and white cow
Orla wonders, "Any other animals?"
Orla realizes also, "I didn't think this through..."
> Orla peeks at a broad-shouldered pitch black friesian horse.

   
ReplyQuote
Ava
 Ava
(@ava)
Trusted Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 81
Topic starter  

I'm awaiting the flood of posts from Margrat's logs from last night lol. 

"One hairdresser does not an olive branch make" -Archduke Alonzo


   
ReplyQuote
Margrat_Maclean
(@margrat_maclean)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 150
 

Margrat, Margrat took her axe

And gave the boar a couple whacks.

Lord Trevyn struck the fatal blow;

Alas, Diego was laid low!

Good Doctor Gen did staunch and stitch.

Diego lost boar-hunting itch.

On high, the rain began to pour.

Lord Trevyn, too, was wounded sore.

Dame Ava held a torch for light

To show good Gen Diego's plight

While Margrat with a towel did blot

Lord Trevyn's blood; he bled a lot!

Then Bruno cooked some fresh boar meat

As did Diego; what a treat!

Gen after cared for Trevyn's hurts,

But then Diego got the squirts!

He puked and shat like fountains fowl;

Soiled Margrat's blanket with his bowels.

We wondered, what could this explain?

Then Margrat gave a cry of pain!

It was the bacon, we all saw;

Cooked partway through (it was half raw).

Diego in his ordure lies;

For bacon does apologize.

Then campfire dies, and ground does flood;

A mess of barf and crap and mud.

Our heroes make a try for town.

At least Diego's pants were brown.

They make it back, and all survive,

Diego barely just alive.

They stable horse, who's smeared with *yuck*.

(Tomorrow they will clean that muck).

To hospital they come at last,

But all their trials are not yet past.

Margrat to chamber pot does rush,

And then her bloomers fill with... Slush.

Gen tells Diego, "Pleahz don die!"

Ava, in sympathy, does cry.

Hours later, stomach cramps do cease,

And all do rest (but none in peace!)

Here ends our heroes' tale at last.

Diego's boar hunts all are past.

The moral hear, for it is big;

Wear armor! And don't eat raw pig!

 

 

 

 


   
Ava, Topsy and Kjell reacted
ReplyQuote
Diego
(@diego)
Active Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 15
 

@margrat_maclean 🤣  🤣  🤣  🤣  🤣  🤣  🤣  🤣  EPIC


   
ReplyQuote
Thalia
(@thalia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 137
 
> OOC -- High Constable Aldo says, "Infanticide is wrong, Eme."
> OOC -- High Constable Aldo says, "We talked about this"
> OOC -- Lady Emeraude says, "Social workers didn't come this time!"
>l eme's purse's child
> You must choose one of Lady Emeraude's tiny slender toddler or Lady Emeraude's small skinny toddler.

   
ReplyQuote
Page 3 / 10
Share: